When I signed up to write a guest post for Ruth, I thought I had selected a topic that was easy-peasy. After much debate and with current political issues screaming for attention, I became indecisive on which one of the major decisions I made in these past 2-1/2 years was the biggest risk. Finally I made my choice: being able to trust someone to fall in love with them after leaving behind an investment of 10 years into a relationship that was not working.
When one thinks about a failed marriage, one thinks about the signs that appeared before and during the relationship. I had kept ignoring them with thoughts of “Just 6 more months and it will get better” along with “It must be my fault; I need to accept that my life will never change to what I want it to be.” In order to seek out relief from that soured relationship, I created new ones that involved yarn — lots and lots of yarn. To this day and everyday, I am grateful for my supportive friends I met through blogging and crafting. The words, “I want a divorce” empowered me and gave me courage to move out of Rhode Island and back into Virginia on Halloween 2009. I had whatever clothes, kitchen pans, yarn and whatever else I could fill in my little Civic. I was so excited at being finally able to come back home. I felt invincible and ready to break the hearts of those who would try hurt me.
Months after I arrived in Virginia, I began hanging out with a small group of friends. A couple of them I met through knitting, some I met through the dart league I played in, some I met throughout my shopping haunts in town. I hit it off with one of them quite well, and after running into each other on various nights at The Pub, we started meeting up there for a game or two. When it turned out my new apartment needed a deadbolt for the back door, my new friend volunteered as long as I would cook dinner. When I talked about how I always wanted to put casters on my immobile 4-ft by 3-ft kitchen island, he left for Lowes to “check out a few things” and came back with all sorts of equipment to make my wish happen. The best part is that he began in the early afternoon and finished in time for me to make dinner!
I could go on and on, but I will spare you the boring details. Though the most interesting part is that early on I kept asking him, “Do you realize how old I am? And that our age difference is 16 years?” My BFF did not care one bit. And before I knew it, we found ourselves only caring about how we feel about each other, and how we make each other happy. For those who have not heard, my BFF and I married last November 11th with just both sets of parents to help us celebrate our wonderful day.
So even if you have been hurt and numbed by a bad love relationship, do not ever fear the risk of finding someone that truly loves you. Especially when that true love thinks you are not an idiot for wanting casters on a kitchen island after your ex-husband told you for almost 10 years that it was the stupidest idea ever.
Falling in love again was the biggest risk I ever took. It has given me the courage to go out and be the “hoppy bunny” I am.
Thank you, Ruth for letting me post this bit from my heart. I congratulate you for taking that big step and making your best friend your lifetime BFF like I did. =:8